Do you beliebe in life after hell?

Let's get the tough stuff out of the way. Justin Bieber has been the center of many different controversies throughout his career. Now the tide has turned, with new information slowly coming into the public consciousness about how difficult it was for him as a child star, and which stakeholders were involved in his career that inevitably traumatised him. He's a complicated figure, he's terrible to his wife, he clearly doesn't like his career, and he barely performed at Coachella beyond a Karaoke session.

There's an argument for every counterargument about Bieber, and I have to say I've cast him as the villain more times than the hero.

Especially post-Coachella, old-school Bieber fever has resurfaced as a trend on the social internet– and people are happily and enthusiastically recounting their experiences being a fan of him in the early days. They're pulling obscure tracks from his early albums, applauding how honest and raw he's become, and otherwise communing about how much his work has meant to them over the years.

This is a trend I'd rather not participate in. Bieber, much like Swift, holds a very specific place in my psyche, tied up with being used as a weapon against me as much as a model of how to be. I was ruthlessly and unceasingly bullied for being a Belieber back in the day, among many other things, to the point that I actually had to leave school at 14. Once I left, being a Belieber was less important to me – his early work had been a lifeline I used to survive "sleeping in the trenches". Once I was metaphorically able to sleep on a proper bed, his presence reminded me of a very sad and dark time in my life, and so his music became harder to hear.

This was also around the time Bieber was getting himself into a lot of trouble – those who were around at the time and deep in the fandom know many of the stories, and over time, there were even more public instances of harm and offense that mounted.

As an indie artist, I've learned that the biggest asset any artist has is access and ownership of their IP and Publishing. When he sold his catalog, I thought that was one of the worst moves he could ever make. However, fans soon explained that the going theory was that Bieber simply wanted out – he was done with his career and all the harm he had associated with it.

This was apparently the reason for the Karaoke at Coachella – trying to find the magic in these old songs, that were now owned by a separate party, and associated with a very dark time in his life – and a career he is no longer certain he enjoys.

On that front, Bieber and I share a commonality.

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